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Sports: Shaq, Cavaliers Start To Bond After Rollerblading Around Cleveland

CLEVELAND—After strapping on inline skates for the first time ever Monday, Cavaliers center Shaquille O'Neal and his new teammates bonded while Rollerblading through the streets of Cleveland.
The onion Sat, 07 Nov 2009 10:39:17 -0500

College Freshman Makes Triumphant Return To High School

COCONUT CREEK, FL—"I'm back, Bayshore High," 18-year-old Henry Doyle announced as he pulled his mother's Toyota Camry slowly into the parking lot normally reserved for faculty, emerging with a knowing grin. "Bet you never thought you'd see the likes ...
The onion Sat, 07 Nov 2009 09:05:41 -0500

[audio] Scientists Dissect Coworker To Find Out More About Scientists

Onion Radio News - with Doyle Redland
The onion Fri, 06 Nov 2009 20:02:36 -0500

The Week's Best Late-Night Jokes

"President Obama said that his economic plan has saved or created one million new jobs. Well, one million and two if you count the new jobs he's created for governors of Virginia and New Jersey." -Jay Leno "One year ago today, ladies and gentlemen, Barack...
About Fri, 06 Nov 2009 20:02:36 -0500

William Shatner Recites Levi Johnston's Tweets

During the summer, William Shatner created a sensation when he appeared on The Tonight Show to perform a dramatic reading of Sarah Palin's farewell speech. It proved so popular that Shatner followed it up with a poetic recitation of Palin's Tweets. Last n...
About Fri, 06 Nov 2009 20:02:36 -0500

The 10 Funniest Moments From Obama's First Year

There were many dire predictions after President Obama was elected about how he would be a disaster for political comedy. While it's safe to say he'll never able to live up to the legacy of George W. Bush or Bill Clinton, during the past year he's still p...
About Fri, 06 Nov 2009 20:02:36 -0500

Hippie Parents Express Disappointment, Frustration At Rebellious Republican Son

Left-leaning activists Don and Regina "Sunshine" Hooper have indicated aggravation to friends and family over what they call "harmful" and "rebellious" actions of their son, Brock, a Republican who is currently attending business school at Ball State.
The enduring vision Thu, 05 Nov 2009 23:30:00 GMT

Get Out Of My Way, My Kids Probably Have Swine Flu

After reading the title of my newest column, you might want to call me Rude Rhonda instead of Nancy Normal! All kidding aside, I do understand that urge, but don't let my joke fool you: I'm one tough momma hen when it comes to protecting my little chicks. ...
The enduring vision Wed, 04 Nov 2009 07:00:00 GMT

Ask A Real Doctor: World Series Edition

For many people, baseball is much more important than their general health or sexual potency. Fortunately, we've pulled our resident medical-esque expert, Dr. Josh, away from reading scientific Wikipedia entries to answer your burning questions about this ...
The enduring vision Tue, 03 Nov 2009 13:30:00 GMT

The 5 Most Unfair Kids Game Shows

Our own Danny Gallagher has a hilarious piece on Cracked.com. We always knew Danny was cracked, and we (meaning...
sillybuddies.com Tue, 03 Nov 2009 13:30:00 GMT

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