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Police find student passed out with car running
Athens police said an officer found a drunken 20-year-old University of Georgia student who tried to drive home after a party passed out at a stop sign with the car still running.
newsvine.com

Man asks to be deported, then kicks police car
Police on Long Island arrested a man after he allegedly kicked a police car and asked to be deported back to his home country of Guatemala. Police said the 27-year-old man called the Southold Police Department early Sunday and asked to be arrested so he could be deported.
boston.com

I KNOW YOU WERE DRUNK YESTERDAY
A fellow decides to take off early from work and go drinking. He stays until the bar closes at three in the morning, at which time he is extremely drunk. After leaving the bar, he returns home on foot.When he enters his house, he doesn't want to wake anyone, so he takes off his shoes and starts tip-toeing up the stairs. Half-way up the stairs though, he falls over backwards and lands flat on his back. That wouldn't have been so bad, except that he had couple of empty pint bottles in his back pockets, and they broke; the broken glass carved up his back terribly. Yet, he was so drunk that he didn't know he was hurt.A few minutes later, as he was undressing, he noticed blood, so he checked himself out in the mirror, and, sure enough, his behind was cut up terribly. He then repaired the damage as best he could under the circumstances, and he went to bed.The next morning, his head was hurting, his back was hurting, and he was hunkering under the covers trying to think up some good story,
naughty.com

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