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Cops: Driver was under influence of bowl of cereal
A Massachusetts man may wish he had breakfast in bed instead of in his car. Police said a man who was stopped for erratic driving on Central Avenue last week was eating a bowl of cereal and milk while he drove. He told officers he was hungry. Lt. John...
SF Gate

Man calls 911 over 28-year-old son`s messy bedroom
An Ohio man who argued with his grown son over a messy bedroom said he overreacted when he called 911. Andrew Mizsak called authorities Thursday after his 28-year-old son _ who's a school board member in the Cleveland suburb of Bedford _ threw a plate of food...
SF Gate

BUSINESS ONE-LINERS 16
Beauty is only skin deep, ugly goes clear to the bone.Before you give a colleague a piece of your mind, be sure you can spare it.Being a good communicator means people find out what is really wrong with you.Believing is seeing.Better latent than never.Beware of a dark-haired man with a loud tie.Beware of a tall dark man with a spoon up his nose.Beware of altruism. It is based on self-deception, the root of all evil.Beware of one who works hard to learn something, learns it, and finds themself no wiser than before. They are full of murderous resentment of people who are ignorant without having come by their ignorance the hard way. - Sir John A. MacDonald, Canada's first prime ministerBeware of those wearing suspenders with belts.
naughty.com

Obese man acquitted for squashing wife to death
A German appeals court overturned a five-year jail sentence on Monday for an obese bus driver who fatally squashed his wife by falling on her during a booze-fuelled row.
KTRK

Fla. police say men called 911 after bad drug deal
Authorities said two men called 911 after they were robbed at gunpoint while trying to buy 20 pounds of marijuana. The Volusia County Sheriff's Office reported that the men went to a home Monday with $12,000 to buy the drugs. Two men at the home jumped them, took their money and drove off. A report said the victims jumped in ...
Boston

Meat Business Cards and Blago Shampoo
I have seen the future, and it is edible. Welcome to the age of Meat Business Cards. Your contact info can now be seared onto a piece of beef jerky,...
KTRK

DON`T MAKE A NURSE ANGRY
A big shot business man had to spend a couple of days in thehospital. He was a royal pain to the nurses because he bossedthem around just like he did his employees.None of the hospital staff wanted to have anything to dowith him. The head nurse was the only one who could stand upto him. She came into his room and announced, 'I have to takeyour temperature.'After complaining for several minutes, he finally settleddown, crossed his arms and opened his mouth.'No, I'm sorry, the nurse stated, 'but for this reading, Icannot use an oral thermometer.' This started another roundof complaining, but eventually he rolled over and bared hisrear end.After feeling the nurse insert the thermometer, he heard herannounce, 'I have to get something. Now you stay JUST LIKETHAT until I get back!'She leaves the door to his room open on her way out. Hecurses under his breath as he hears people walking past hisdoor laughing. After almost an hour, the man's doctor comesinto the room.'What's going on here?' a
naughty.com

OH man calls 911 over messy room argument with son
An Ohio man who argued with his grown son over a messy bedroom says he overreacted when he called 911.
Boston

Francis Bacon
The general root of superstition is that men observe when things hit, and not when they miss; and commit to memory the one, and forget and pass over the other. Discuss
Thefreedictionary

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